Category Archives: offbeat

Top 8 Worst Behavioral Interview Questions

You know you’ve been asked one of the worst interview questions when your interview turns into an outerview to leave. If you’ve ever thought to yourself “I gotta get outta here,” chances are you were confronted by an awkward or ridiculous job interviewer or experience. Here are the top 10 (un)best behavior interview questions.

  1. Tell me about a time where you had to see yourself in 5 years and failed to fire your potential boss but overcame a change despite getting the work done late while multitasking in a workplace with high discrimination.
  2. If you could choose for anyone to be alive or deceased to have lunch with, would you eat with someone alive or deceased?
  3. If you could be a slave to an alien creature, what would you be?
  4. Does it bother you if I continue this interview while standing closely behind you so you can’t see me and I’ll be eating pungent cheese?
  5. Tell me about a time that you didn’t work well with a supervisor. What was the outcome and how would you have changed the outcome if the outcome included you severely injuring the supervisor and covering up the evidence?
  6. Why do you think you will be successful at your job when your career is going down the toilet?
  7. Tell me about a time when you participated in a team, and you were asked to stop hitting on the members, physically or sexually? What measures did you take to ensure that others didn’t snitch on you.
  8. How many years does it take you to do simple tasks? Explain the most difficult situation that is simple for everyone else, but you were not intelligent enough to accomplish the task in a timely manner. How did you bring the bad news to your boss and what company rules did you break to keep your job.

Bacon Everything + Bacon Snuggies

I really like bacon. Even Vegan bacon will do, but nothing can beat the real thing. Whoever invented bacon eating is probably getting punished for causing lodged bacon in the heart.

I want to make these fabulous bacon bowls:
Mac & Cheese Bacon Bowls

I also believe in the political campaign of bacon. Begin the rev-O-lution with donuts and bacon.

And now all we need are bacon snuggies to keep us warm in the winter, and keep us fed on the couch. Lady Marmalade Lady GAGA went too far with her raw meat costume, but if it were bacon I would have let it slide… right into my mouth.

Poor and Busy don’t mix

when you have no time, no money; no life. You can make a lifting at work. Lifing becomes the action of life- a verbing. You can make a life of having little money to satisfy basic needs. Lifing is the most difficult task, but the sweeting pleasure.

I’d shuffle cards til the day I die to get a couple of winnings at gambling. I’d throw my shoe at the stock market. It’s the market that is always a little too fresh for my taste. I’ve got no tastebuds. I’ve haven’t got buds. Or pals. Just google. I love you honey. I married by feeling lucky.

Be the best you can be. That’s what they say. Solitaire confinement is all I get.

Are Polars Opposites? Inquire about Wire-Heading.

What if evil was wholly disjointed from the entity that is declared good? Well, it would be good when taken with the other that is contrasted. Blindly taken alone is incomprehensible as a room with no light in it or when one looks at the sun. There is a supposed problem of evil, yet without it goodness has no worth. And lowly aspect of goodness become evil in replacement of the absence of evil. The Manicheans believe that the universe was created or is the collision between good and evil. They suggested that one should strive to be good but that pure goodness would not be attainable without ending the universe and even existence.

On the opposite end, this end of the universe experience is promoted through wire-heading. Wire-heading is hedonism by means of programmable post-human pleasure at its maximum and the implications of developing a pain-free being would only cause them either to lose humanity or to develop pain from the pure happiness. This is the ambition of the perfection of mankind which I think is rather impossible.

I guess it would just be you connected to a machine that constantly gave the feeling of ultimate sex (or whatever your view of the best pleasure is) like a stream of chemical data that would block any negative aspects and only produce positive effects. This would be administered either by implantation of a supercomputer type device or somehow just alteration by speeding up natural selection toward perfection. There are scientist and futurist who are saying that we are coming closer to increasing the rate of evolutionary process.

However, morphine blocks pain, leads to addiction/withdrawal, perhaps it could sustained. Dopamine flood and all the sudden–too much and you simply go loco. I feel that technology would end micro-evolution before it enhanced it.

Perhaps science could could invent receptors that are wired to prevent overload, which is a 40 year old promise yet to be fulfilled. People might still get lonely. Not if they could somehow create impulses of companionship but there you’d lose any reason to be alive if it was all illusory, which is what the goal essentially is (to have the programed reality become superior or to stamp out the human race).

This is genetic engineering, my friends. This is reification, folks. And reification is regard or treat (an abstraction) as if it had concrete or material existence.

Wireheading may have potential to destroy all pain and create unlimited hedonic pleasure (possibly unreal, void of authentic happiness)

  • this may already be happening on a small scale with drugs or gene selection
  • this could also limit free will if we are programmed with certain mental modes

“Wireheading has punctured the barrier of thoughts in the brain to map onto computer functions which has lead a paraplegic to carry out games of Tetris, and other stunts.” It has also given disadvantageous opportunity for abuse and extremity toward a fallacy of eternity.

Nobody has ever seen a monkey with arms.

monkey arm snapshot

I was at the zoo and I saw an ape /primate (not a gorilla) getting potty trained in the public restroom. This made me realize something: monkeys arms are one of the rarest things to discover. This is because like bears, they actually have four feet and four legs and four limbs. I love howler monkeys and monkeys in captivity and also in the wild. Monkeys do the dishes without arms– now tell that to your housemaid.

Even cute Snow Monkeys have legs growing out of their shoulders. It’s a worldwide phenomenon.

Snow Monkey

Missy Died. And all I got was a poster…

Mr. meany mosquitee really hurt my feelings.

It made for quite a funny story, but my kitty kat/puppy cat was really special. Missy had genital herpes and I was taking her to the vet to get her monthly shot…

I saved $83.99. Well, I guess it’s not so bad. And I learned how to make my own poster.

MISSY? If you can read this, come home!

If you have your pager or a couple dimes, please call. You can even call COLLECT.

US Amendment for Animal Suffrage

Just recently in this new decade animal voting has become a concern for animal rights activists. The U.S. Presidential election could have been swayed to a third party given the chance of uninformed voters such as pets, stray critters, and zoo friends. The first start towards advancing suffrage for animals would be readily available identification cards. Collar I.D.s and neck tags have become popular as well as microchips, but none of these can be used at ballot booths.

A controversial aspect of this is measuring the intelligence of various species. The IQ test is skewed with cultural bias toward homosapiens. Yet no other cognitive aptitude has met the success of this pressing issue. Some extremists are insisting on amoeba and bacteria representation for elections and voting events of the government. It is about time someone has stepped to the plate to discuss these matters. The mass media has stifled this movement for years and it is finally getting press in local independent and DIY newspapers, magazines, and articles.

It’s about time elephants and donkeys actually have access to their voice in how things are run. Keep an eye on your nearest king of the jungle about the US amendment to instate animal suffrage.

passed futurism

talk about furutism…

The artistic movement “futurism” is past tense.
I was thinking of this painting (can’t remember artist or title) of a (wheel?) in motion.

There are things not seen with the naked eye but with photography and film we’ve been able to “slow things down” (not literally of course).

And “flying rod” exobiological theory. They’re essentially rods that fly….*you can only see them on slowed down camera footage*

There was something I thought of about the reasoning of the people that want to believe in flying rods that is similar to the ideals of futurism. Perhaps both parties (the flying rodders and the futurists) are nostalgic for the future?

video documentation

Human Milk Farm

what do baby pigs drink? pig milk.
what do baby ducks drink? duck milk.
what do baby cows drink? cow milk.

Should we drink homosapien milk? But are we not babies?

A natural same-species milk would require a new sector of jobs where women or even men would work on a lactation plantation. Digress from the future; back in time the Aztec women used their breast milk as a weapon against conquistadors.

Husband comes home from a long day, “Man I could use a glass of warm fresh milk.” Wife asserts disgustedly, “You think you’re the only one that works around here? That’s it. You’re cut off”. “Honey please? I’m thirsty.”

How about fortifying human milk with protein hormone rHGH instead of rBGH (human growth hormone/bovine growth hormone)?

Go organic and obtain the highest quality by altering diets of the milked humans to obtain a better milk quality. Only grain-fed human milk will be allowed.

May contain milk warning?

Talk is Cost-Effective

If you multiply
the times you said something,
I will divide
the times I heard them.

Shop for the correct words while super-marketing. The cheapness of speaking is not stifled by inflation. Ready for the lips to close? You will be dismayed to hear quotation marks in their place. Roaring airs will spout from sealed mouths like a leaky valve. Sewage. Spewage. For the sake of Pete, put a leash on that clich-(eh).

Seminars on who to tell, why to tell, tell you how, tell you now, tell you what, tell you when. Rent the hotels to speak about meeting speakers who rent the hotels that meet renters who speak about hotels that speak meters of rent for speaking about hotels that meet rent for speech. Put some lipstick where your money goes. Talk is cost-effective.